Wrestling with God and being authentic about it
Good morning, friends!  Did you know that I go through nights of spiritual battle?  Did you know that God's direction is and can be intimate and clear?  
Last night was one such night.  I know it may be a bit jarring to not know that I have had these kinds of nights for years - that it's a particular calling of mine to wrestle in the spirit at night and to really talk with the Lord in the quiet of the night. 
Anyway, I've got to live into this.  For years I've been belittled and segregated and "put in a corner" as a "crazy" person, and then you know what?  I looked in the Scriptures and read story after story of prophet after prophet who was told exactly the same.  
I tried to take the mantle off to be more acceptable to people. 
Then, you know what?  I started feeling icky, over months, and months, and months.  Like, my emotional stress of having removed that mantle was affecting my physical well-being. 
Call it what you will, but I'm done trying to change and morph to be pretty for people I don't really know.  
Last night God and I had some pretty profound conversations about it, to which the result I came away with was that I would start seeing some of the physical strain alleviate as I lived into more of who I am.  
And the verse for today I have is for all of us!  Go look it up - it's Lamentations 3:21-24.  God's mercies are new every morning!  

Let me know in the comments!  What do you need today?  What do you expect from the Lord?  Have you told Him so?

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