"...is better than a good day somewhere else."
Almost 10 years ago, that's what I heard as I was contemplating homeschooling my two very tiny kids.
Now that sounds all noble and sweet, but at the time I heard this audible voice in my head, I was only two months into a really challenging hear teaching at a small Christian school.
I will get into details about this job in many, many blog posts, but for now, suffice it to say if I hadn't signed a contract, I would have quit.
The experiment didn't go well, my experiment seeing if I could swing making a difference in the community, earning a paycheck, and still momming awesomely. Yeah, it wasn't all it was cracked up to be. In fact, I was cracking under the pressure.
Teaching in a Christian school sounded like a fabulous place and way to serve, but it ended up to be a nightmare. I really have to think about how much I want to share, so I'm not holding out on you. Suffice it to say it's taken me about 10 years and lots and lots of work and habits designed to heal as I've brought myself out of the trauma. So, I'll figure out how to share this harrowing story
As I contemplated in October how I had to stay in my job, despite my overwhelming desire to quit, I heard a still, small voice ask, "don't you want to homeschool? Other people are teaching your kids, while you're teaching other people's kids. Doesn't make sense, does it?"
No, for me it didn't. That solidified my desire to homeschool. Now, I do believe that every family has a different path to follow for their family related to their children's education. But for us, the message became clear that year.
And homeschool for me was a healing process that had to happen. My heart had to heal, and God was going to use my kids and my new daily schedule to do it.
Follow along with me as I heal through writing. I'll share with you my painful story, and I hope you see with me that God would put me back together and create a sweet story of His saving grace for all of us as we learned and recovered together.